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unable to sleep so here i am again. i woke up from a dream that i don't really remember, but of course it was a dream about fucking ai. i was reminded of the idea of GANs where we have two distinc roles for the AI, and how finding the careful balance between them led to led to much better (at the time) outputs, way before diffusion was a thing. I'm gonna bring it up with Thorsten and see if see if the idea resonates with him. it'll be a couple weeks out at least i imagine, but we have an agent that can run now, but if we make 2 can we get them to dance? is this what the rievew agent should look like? i'm not sure if they will merge into beautiful symbiosis, and whether we can get them to dance, but the idea has been intoxicating to me so far.
then all this ai thought, i realized that i'm afriad to post about it online. afraid to damit that i've lost a lot of my community semblance and moral compass? that isn't just specific to AI, but AI feels like it's played a big role in this unbecoming. i cared so deeply about craft, and now i'm vibe coding my way into all kinds of new problems. i haven't physically written a line of code in at least 3 weeks now, and it's also making hhme upset. it's making me lazy, and i'm losing the prefigurative-ness to my politics in a certain regard? idk, maybe i'm just feeling far away from merveilles and it's making me sad, because so many people there are very outspoken about being against AI in all it's forms. I think I will need to write some justification to get it out of my head, and get back to feeling more normal, more in tune with my community? I think this is also related to why i've been so "inward" lately. Where I haven't been going to dweb events, or connecting with people. I want to sit down and explore these feelings more and write about them. I do feel the need to write coming back. Even in the age of AI, I continue to do my own writing. I think that's important.
But all this thought of writing got me to think about the current state of my notes. I watched a bev vallack (keyboard guy) viedo about his notes, even though they're not a zettelkasten (lo, i'm mad) it did inspire new thoughts about starting over. I think a lot of the notes in my wiki are pretty useless now, and i don't use any of them really. The only time I do open it is for things like this, or little lists that I will need to remember. I think I do want to start over. I cornered myself with all this write the spec myself and build the tools, and the supporting infrastrcture. While i do still care about owning my tools nad being in control, i no longer think i have the will power to make it better than the standard that exits, even if i hate it: yaml plus markdown. i mean, i don't hate it, mown spec is heavily based on markdown anyway. the thing I hated was yaml, but since using it more and more at work, i think i'm coming around to it. I want to try zk and see if i can speedrun a rebuild of msomething approaching my wiki. And then also keep these jrnl's in a different place maybe? i'm not sure if they need to be linked, but this is a log, each jrnl should at the very least link to the previious journal so i can keeping reading back through my life. which leaves me with 3 things for the new hyl.st website: stream, garden, log. I quite like the metaphor, I feel like i'm on fire today with the dancing first, and then these 3.
Okay, hopefully that's enough of a brain dump to go bac kto sleep for a few hours